In Progress

There, I fixed the seizure-inducing template. Now I have no comments, and no time to reinstall them. Since, after all, I'm supposed to be writing a short paper comparing these two damn slave narratives, and I only have a lame intro paragraph so far. Oh yeah, it's due tomorrow morning. Oh well. Back to work. Comments to come.

Technical Difficulties

New favorite blog names: "Yo Homie Come Blog With Me" and "Tainted Blog" (both from the newly updated blog list)

As for my seizure-inducing template... I couldn't find a way to change the timing, but I'm gonna try to get some help, cuz overall I really like the idea. Especially the part where my incredibly anal friends could pick their own font and font size. But if I can't fix the timing, I'll have to change it. Be patient for the next day or so, while I try to work it out. If not, I'll switch.
Any volunteers to help walk me through the installation of a template I downloaded off one of those lovely graphic sites?

blah, blah, blah

Let It Snow
It's been snowing all day, more than 5 inches. Big, gloppy flakes, as much water as snow, and they're just gorgeous. Snowmen and women went up within hours, and most likely the snow penis has made its appearance somewhere on campus as well. Temps are hovering at 32, so it'll probably all melt by tomorrow... but it was nice while it lasted. Interesting way to celebrate the first day of spring, though.
The update isn't coming along very well - I like the blogskins idea, but I don't like giving them my password. And applying one myself is still quite nervewracking. I opened up some of the files and still haven't figured out what the first thing to do is.
Spring break on campus is pretty boring... sleepy, cooking with A., cleaning dishes and dishes and dishes (god, I miss the dining hall!) and doing loads and loads of laundry.
I was sorta planning on heading out to Boston for the weekend, with plans of meeting up with a certain person... but now it just seems like it's not worth it. All that effort to dress up, drive, stay the night at some hotel, spend all that money, just on the chance that I might hit it off with this person, which based on recent history, is unlikely. And I've actually got homework I should do before class starts next week, so I think I'm staying home this weekend.
Was talking to a friend the other day, about a liasion I turned down recently, which led to a survey of the past three months, which have seen me turn away five women for various reasons, all but four of them before getting "intimate." Which, for those who know me, is pretty new and unusual behavior for me. Not that I'm some wild tramp, just that I'm usually more of an "act first, realize what a big mistake I'm making later" kinda gal.
We were talking about how amazing it is to stand still and realize how much we've changed, how much our behavior has changed. (she's been going through similar stuff recently.) The part of me that hates being alone/lonely is scared by this new behavior, scared it means I'll be alone forever, that my standards (in combination with my own issues/imperfections) will keep me single forever. But while that part is the voice I'm used to listening to, it seems that nowadays there's another, more rational and secure voice that has taken precedence. This voice says it's worth it to wait, that I deserve better than what I've been getting, and that I don't need someone as much as I need the right one. I like this new voice (actually, it's been around for awhile, I just never listened to it so much.)
So, this is progress, right? Now, someone just promise me that it doesn't mean I'll be single forever! ::::::laughing:::::

Time For a Change
Okay y'all, I'm hunting for a new template... I've downloaded a few that I like, but to be honest, I don't think I'm capable of applying them myself. Sooooo, I'm contemplating using this blogskins thingie... be patient - it could get messy.

Sorry!
Okay - it's just amazing how lack of a personal computer in the privacy of my own room makes blogging just much less do-able. So here I sit in the communal computer room, hoping nobody gets insomnia and decides to come down and read over my shoulder, and chanting "don't forget to clear the history" under my breath. Not my idea of fun. I am either getting my computer fixed this weekend or I'm buying a new one! (Most likely gonna just have my hard drive wiped clean, which sucks. Thank god I backed up all my personal files a few weeks ago. But still.... pooh.)
Okay - here's the bullet on life.
Last week N. showed up for drag ball (which I wore corset, miniskirt, fishnets and heels to) all weird, and they ended up leaving after only about 15-20 minutes, without hardly saying goodbye. I was fairly outraged, but too tipsy to dwell much on it. (oh yeah, we had done some face-to-face time the night before, so I was thinking things were going pretty well up till then)
Turns out the next day, THEY WERE STONED! Not just N., who had a limited time of recovery, but my friend from work who had SIX YEARS OF RECOVERY! I was in shock, and really pretty disappointed in them all, and completely wrote N. off. She finally called later that day to apologize, and I took the opportunity to tell her that it's one thing if she want's to throw away her chance at getting clean, but she shouldn't take others down with her. God I'm such a self-righteous prig sometimes. Oh well.
Hmmmmm, let's see.... also that night my "straight" neighbor finally admitted she wanted to sleep with me, and we kissed, which was against my better judgement but I just really wanted to, but then nothing else has happened cuz I sort of have a problem with the fact that she's ENGAGED to her BOYFRIEND of FOUR YEARS! I don't play that game, even if I might want to. Course, now I'm stuck being the one she pours out her little lesbian coming out of the closet saga to.... yay me. But she's a doll, and a good friend, and fun to boot, so it's all good.
School's been kicking my ass cuz I've been buried from all the work I missed while I was sick. But, I've got all my papers in except for the reading response I should be writing right now, and a paper proposal that's due Friday and will be written Thursday night. So I'm in good shape, finally. And I'm almost totally caught up on my reading as well, which is a nice feeling.
OH - Got an A- on my Heroine or Whore paper for American Studies, which was fairly gratifying. I get my Ed. Psych and WWII papers back tomorrow... keeping my fingers crossed that I can keep up this A-only streak for papers. It's exciting to realize that if I don't just totally drop the ball and self-destruct, I could make all As this semester! WooHoo!
Hmmmm.... let's see... what else? I think I'm staying here for summer (y'all don't tell Dad, he still wants me to come back to the evil empire) and working with the kids.
Oh, and I'm really getting firm on the idea of being a high school American history teacher.... I love everything about it, except for the lack of respect and lousy pay. But then, that comes with all my career choices - journalist, non-profit, education, mother. So might as well embrace it, eh?
On the health front, I'd have to say I'm back to normal, knock on wood. But since my Trinidadian friend is convinced it's my diet that made me so sick for so long, I am making a concerted effort to eat more vegetables. (had brussel sprouts tonight... yummy!) Also, I'm really thinking that it is an after-effect from the horrible Christmas I had, sort of a symptom of the system-shock I went through. Hopefully that won't continue to manifest itself that way, and I can make it through the rest of spring semester sans disease.
Next week is Spring Break.... but not for me. Gotta still work, gotta write a paper, gotta catch up on more reading, gotta clean my room, gotta do laundry. Yay. But I'm taking Tuesday off, and me and my pals are gonna do the movie matinee followed by sushi experience. ::::::::::::::where's K when I need her?::::::::::::::
Well, that's it that I can think of. No artful prose (like that every happens anyway, right?) but I thought I'd catch y'all up. I really missed writing here, it's definitely my journal/diary and I've always enjoyed having one. Just got to get my damn computer fixed.

Sickness Everywhere
Okay - I have a minute on the communal computer here.... I got the stomach flu (yes, I am cursed) and my computer apparently decided to have sympathy pains and it no longer will operate. It gives me a stupid message saying that I am missing a file for windows to operate, and I should reload windows. Which I'd love to do but it's not recognizing my CD drive, so I CAN'T!!!!! It's tres irritating.

I know I've been gone too long, and I apologize. Especially since I have so much to tell y'all.......

I'll be back, probably this weekend.

Update Coming Soon
Sorry for the weekend-long hiatus... it's just been a really weird weekend, and I haven't had the time/energy/inclination to post about it yet. However, it was fairly interesting, so I will try to get it down either tonight or tomorrow (probably tomorrow, as I'm finishing a paper tonight.)
Teasers: N. takes the ball, but fouls out (did I mix sports metaphors there?) and I come exceedingly close to breaking one of my cardinal rules about just what kind of lesbian I am. Also, much shopping and the purchase of purple hair dye.
See y'all soon!

HIGH FIVE ME!
It's done! I just emailed my paper to my profs and I am feeling the oddest mixture of elation and dread. Well, I guess I always sort of feel that mixture. But this is particularly strong, shall we say? I think the paper is decent, though not nearly as analytical and deconstructive like they want, I'm sure. But hey, I can only write what I can write. I'll be happy to get a B on this one (though it'll be my first on a paper here... but hey, everyone has a bad day, right?)
So, wish me luck on that.
Now I have to go get dressed and go to work (after stopping to pick up my free Lea DeLaria tickets - woohoo! - and cashing my check.) Have I mentioned that I hope my car hasn't been towed, since I left it in a commercial parking lot for the past two days since I couldn't find parking ANYWHERE on my side of campus Wednesday? Hmmmm, that would suck, eh?
Oh yeah, only 3 hours of sleep.... I can feel the headache coming on. Also, I think I'm gonna end it with N. tonight, if we can actually get together and I can get up the guts. I keep rehearsing it in my head like it's from some bad sitcom about young single 20-somethings, which is sort of how I view my whole life, which might explain much of the difficulty.
Laters!

It's Almost Done!
Okay, now I'm really in college, I suppose. It's 5:26 a.m. and I just finished the majority of my paper, which is due tomorrow before I go to work, and I'm going to bed because I can barely type, much less think. In 4 hours a friend will be here to rifle through my closet in search of "girl" clothes to wear to the drag ball, and I will have to shower, shave, and write the conclusion to this godforsaken piece of crap I call my American Studies paper. I did go through and doublecheck my citations and my footnotes, so I shouldn't have too much last minute stuff tomorrow (other than editing all the drivel I probably wrote in my fatigue-induced stupor.) And I've got notes for the conclusion, I just didn't have my "flashy writer" cap on, and this paper's gonna need a REALLY good conclusion to make it even halfway decent.
Oh yeah, forgot to mention, fell off the wagon tonight. Had a diet coke at dinner and then bought one to study with. I know, I know, I'm bad. Quote from dinner when my table saw the forbidden nectar on my tray: "Screw God, I'm thirsty!" So yeah, I'm going to hell.... but at least I know all my friends will be there too, right?
Tomorrow back on the wagon, I promise. No more Diet Coke.
Goodnight.